I think I need to realize that relationships cause actions. One person cannot be completely resposible OR not responsible for his/her actions. One person's actions are a catalyst to the other person's reaction. I need to work on the, "jesus Christ, I'M sick of that shit!!!!" as well as the, "I FUCKED IT ALL UP!!!!!" thoughts, both of which I do way too much.
I also think I'm too arrogant. I have no humility when it comes to my intelligence, or my reasoning abilities, and this helps fuel many semantic-based rifts in discussions that end in angry arguments. I think the reason that I'm arrogant, is that I have close to no self-esteem when it comes to the rest of who I am. I'm angry at who I am, but I spend so much time reasoning about it that I never do anything other than attempt to reason my way out of it. I think to be humble, one has to be content with himself/herself on a total level. I see this as a reason that everyone is arrogant to some extent; i might be just a little more polarized than some.
Thoughts on this, anyone?
I feel so strange that i don't know why i can't understand myself. i love my friends, i love my life, but i'm not sure if that's merely placation, or not.
Placation is a
Vacation from arduous thought that warrants
Investigation. Is this a good
Justification for the
Marginalization of the
Sensation of emotion that fuels the
Rationalization of my everyday
Immotion?
Wow, I like my poem that just came out (I did have to work through it a little bit.) I'm done now.
No comments:
Post a Comment